[Post-GAPS]

[formerlysiryn]

Perhaps she's hiding away, but Terry thinks she has every bloody right to.

It had been days locked up in that facility, she finds out, days powerless, days spent poked and prodded and having her power tested like she's some sort of bloody lab rat. Whatever they'd done, they'd been good at it; good enough to kidnap her and others, good enough to get around their defenses, good enough to keep them locked up.

They'd been so good that after the rage burns through her, after she'd done her part and took off for the countryside to prevent herself from doing something she'd regret, all she'd felt was raw. Exposed. Careless.

She'd promised herself that would never happen again, but she can't even keep promises to herself anymore.

The school had come to mind first, the only place she could think of that was safe. Even if someone knew she was there, they wouldn't be able to get past the wards.

She's safe.

She's safe.

Once she showers, once she scrubs away a week of sweat and blood, constantly humming or singing to herself, filling the silence with her own voice as she changes into a fresh set of clothes, once she has no reason to move anymore--

It builds up in her chest first, a mounting pressure that rises, burning the back of her throat and clouding her vision with tears as she stumbles downstairs, makes it into the huge basement and trusts, trusts that she can let go of the scream she's been holding in for days and the world won't crumble around her.

[Let's say she left the basement door open a touch to be heard. Takes place the morning after GAPS plot wraps up.]

Comments

[and_proud]

"What happened?" Raven asks, though she's not sure she wants to know. Looking into the seeing stones had terrified her even more than the stories she'd been warned of regarding her future, had made her aware that her fears weren't just possibilities, but realities elsewhere. Sometimes she just wants to beg it all off and feign ignorance. Today, though, she knows she has to find out. "Where did you go?"

[formerlysiryn]

Terry shakes her head at the question, not even sure how to answer it.

"Some...some lab." She spits the word out, lacing it with all the fear and rage she's had locked up within for days. "Someone got me, they got a bunch of us, they were runnin' experiments. On our powers."

Somehow making them absolutely helpless in the process, and Terry can't imagine anyone else who'd been caught up in that mess feels any better than she does at this very moment.

[and_proud]

Immediately, Raven wants to be sick.

It's not quite a year since she'd seen herself tortured with electrodes on a cold, metal table. Back then, Theresa had been at her side to comfort her. She'd reminded her it wasn't real, but Raven can't offer her the same kindness right now.

In fact, she has no real idea what she can do.

"I'm so sorry," is all she can manage. She feels overwhelming guilt at the fact she somehow managed to avoid whatever atrocities befell Theresa and the others. She can't for the life of her imagine why. "Do you... should we go upstairs? Do you want to eat?"

[formerlysiryn]

Terry immediately regrets her words as she remembers the sorts of things Raven's been exposed to in the past, the things Terry knows she's afraid of. Any mutant would be right to be afraid of it, but Terry, stupid as it seems now, hadn't expected anything of that caliber to ever happen here.

All the past week has shown her is how much the human race stays the same, no matter where they are.

She breathes in deeply, carefully, and nods at Raven's questions. Company sounds good, food even better, and having her mind set on something else will help. For now, at least.

As she moves toward the door, Terry stops beside Raven, turning to look her over and happy to see her in one piece. "I'm glad ye weren't there."

[and_proud]

Part of Raven is glad she wasn't there, of course, but most of her is stuck on the guilt that she was somehow spared. From what Charles had told her, experiments in her future were instrumental in being used against the mutant race.

She can cause so much damage, she knows, and yet she couldn't save Theresa from what went on.

"Food," she says by way of response, because she still doesn't know what else to say. She's sorry, she's stunned, she's sick to her stomach. They make their way up the stairs, toward the kitchen. "What are you in the mood for?"

Probably anything, Raven figures, but she still asks.

[formerlysiryn]

Terry nods and follows Raven, knowing she can't find it easy to deal with everything in such a short amount of time. Terry hardly knows how to feel about it all herself, beyond the rage that is fading bit by bit, replaced with a bone-deep weariness she hasn't felt in a long time.

It's a weariness that makes her weak, and as much as she doesn't relish the prospect of leaving the school, she already knows she'll be heading to group as soon as possible tomorrow.

"Anything, honestly," she says, knowing there isn't too much in the kitchen anyway. As long as it's not the bland crap they served in the facility, Terry will eat -- if only because she knows she must.

[and_proud]

By the time they've reached the kitchen, Raven's blue again. She's been more open with her identity around the school, even if it's still a struggle.

There's only Theresa around, now, though, and she's one of the people who Raven trusts wholeheartedly.

She manages to find the makings of a sandwich and some fruit in the fridge, preparing it perhaps more slowly than she needs to so she can avoid the questions she needs to ask. "They hurt you?" she asks eventually, without looking up, pushing a plate across the counter at Theresa.

[formerlysiryn]

Terry barely blinks when Raven transforms, though there are moments she has to remind herself that Raven and Mystique aren't necessarily the same. Not anymore, anyway; the Mystique Terry knows is someone else entirely, a world away.

She's too tired to give much thought to it now, anyway. Raven is the one making her food and being a friend, and that's about all that matters, in the long run.

"No," she answers quietly, pulling the plate closer. She picks up a few grapes, eating slowly and enjoying the fruit after days of eating whatever they'd called food in that place. "They did hurt a few people, but not me. They kept me in a collar the whole time unless they wanted to test my scream. Kept me mute."

She can still feel the heaviness of the collar around her neck, though she knows all that's left of it is the redness from where it chafed.

[and_proud]

Pain or no pain, the thought makes Raven feel sick. If halting Theresa's abilities was the goal, she has to figure that they'd try and stop Raven from being able to shapeshift.

She hates the idea of that more than almost anything. Not just because she'd be stuck looking like this forever, but because there are times where she half-enjoys having the ultimate upper hand at playing pretend.

Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, Raven pauses to stare at her blurred reflection in the stainless steel and wonder again why she was spared. "You must be thirsty," she says, finally, turning back and sitting down. "Were there many others?"

[formerlysiryn]

"There were quite a few," Terry says with a nod. She takes a long drink of water, doing her best to tip toe around the memories, take what she can remember and filter away the rage and helplessness as best as she can.

It's not perfect, but it helps for now.

"Not just mutants, I don't think. A werewolf. Some magic users. Some I couldn't tell one way or the other, but we were all powered."